hjays

Category: IM

  • 3 Yr Old IM Conversations

    I was cleaning out my old VoodooPad today and found this old blog draft. Probably didn’t immediately post this at the time because I assume it read a little embarrassing? Today I just find it confusing because 3 years later I still haven’t learned what Pirate Sex is exactly. AFB: How was your V-Day?Yellowbeard: well…

  • Important Twitter Conversations

    IRS: Going to the car show and looking at minivans is like going to the strip club and looking at the dj Yellowbeard: but u could fuck a gangload os stripper & or AZN car show bitches in that van. Yellowbeard: I guess I m just the kind of person who needs the type of…

  • Lets Start A Band

    AFB: I was just in the tanning both. I feel like I should be in a Cock Rock band. Whatta say Yellowbeard, you still got those moves?? 03:31 PM April 07, 2008 from web Yellowbeard: Bandname has 2 b THE ASS FUCKIN OF 43 VIRGINS…our first single is TAKE OUR SLOPPY SECONDS!!! 04:34 PM April…

  • 1st hjays Poetry Contest

    Yes, you read that correctly hjays is having a poetry contest for Valentine’s Day. Well it is kind of in the spirit of one of my more popular posts back in March ’07. This year I am hoping to get a LOT more submissions. Unlike a wonderful poem submitted by AFB last year contributers will…

  • Tea Bagging

    Well she wasn’t until I taught her, she had NO idea what she was in store for. Too her credit she was very trusting cuz I was just like close your eyes stick out tong and BOOMSHAKALAKA!!! I just dropped em on her!!

  • WOW..my best post EVER

    I am drunk, hungry, and horny….JC it must be SUNDAY!!! isn’t a shame that I have integrated my brain so well will my Mac that all I have to do is think it and it does it??

  • The White Eyepatch

    i don’t think that jizzing bitches eyes shut really occurs to most, people are kind of short sighted & most dudes lack real imagination.  so i am sure i could easily get away with it. u know what i am gonna make that a blog post in an of it self & call it a…

  • In Honor of Metzler’s Birthday

    So I was going through my Voodoo Pad today working through my to do list & cleaning up some old shit. That is when I came across an old post that I started to work on, but never got around to finishing. Well in honor of it being Metzler’s Birthday yesterday I think it might…

  • Hypothetical Dick Math

    yellowbeard:i did some hypothetical math and she has fucked a lot of dicks sasquatch: O yeah sasquatch: but I think daniel has her beat yellowbeard: actually my hypothetical math applies to her as well. sasquatch: its high yellowbeard: let me break down my math for you sasquatch: please do so yellowbeard: lets say conservatively they…

  • vugly vs. fuglyvag

    It started out innocently enough. Just chatting about weekend plans at work on a Friday afternoon. Then the conversation turns to vaginas as it so often does. Even the turn to ugly vaginas is not out of the ordinary. It all went down something like this: AFB: Then you have nothing to worry about Yellowbeard:…