As some of you know, my work decided to get me a Black Berry, and pay for my phone plan every month. Because of the incredible capabilities of this thing (most I will not find out about until I sit down with Yellowbeard and he shows me how to work this thing to its full potential), I have decided to retire the RAZR.

The hardest part about this transition, is that the BB does NOT have a picture phone in it. I still do not understand why such a device with all of these capabilities would NOT just include a camera, but unfortunately, it does not. So, this Memorial Day weekend, I had to take all of the images that I have taken over the years with my old V3, and send them to the laptop via Blue Tooth. I must say, it was an emotional roller coaster viewing these pictures onto my computer, some of which I forgot I even had since I had 134 pictures on there. I would like to share some of the highlights of these pictures, of course excluding some I took of my balls when drunk, or of shitty ass room service food that I would send to people when on the road to get sympathy. So here we go.

The Beginning:

This is what I believe to be the first ever picture that I took of my ex roommate, Metzler. Kind of a shitty picture if you ask me, but hey, I was new at this.

This is my second ever picture, of my mother, to use as her picture when she called… She tried for 2 years to get this thing off of my phone with no success.

Asians:

In my travels through work, I get the honor of working with teeny asian chics from time to time. As these opportunities arose, I tried to take pictures of them. As you can see, I didn’t do a very good job, as both of these shots turned out like shit.. Maybe taking the ability to take photos from my phone was the best thing that could happen, for my sake, and everyone else’s. NOTE: I also work with the guy on the bottom who is still yet to hook me up with any of his slutty asian friends.

Two Chics

Again, poor picture quality. Half because of the camera, and half because I was unable to get them to take their clothes off for the pic. Both, regrettable, my fault.

Gentlemen’s Club:

Amy‘s apparent “First Lap dance” ever…. Hmmm

S Club in Detroit, MI

I was never able to master the art of taking RAZR pictures of strippers at clubs. For this, I apologize to everyone

Work Related:

Yes, believe it or not, at one point I actually used this camera for good. These are some random pics at Delphi, and some carpet manufacturer I don’t remember.

Sporting Events:

Ford Field, Detroit

Kentucky Derby

Lambeau Field

Metrodome for Twins Game

Fuj and Jess

For some reason, I had a LOT of pictures with Fuj and Jessi… Mostly, it was when one or both was drunk, and the other was taking advantage of each other.

Misc:

William “Refrigirator” Perry at a trade show in Chicago

After target practice with BeeBee gun in the back yard… It took two shots for this guy to go down. Still not determined if air rifle fired two rounds or not.. Still under investigation.

Taken to prove to Amy that Shredded Lettuce DOES exist… She has yet to successfully find this product at the grocery store for Taco Night..

This was taken in a bathroom at a gas station in Prosper, TX. about 3 miles away from Deion Sanders mansion. Not sure it this guy was guarding the bathroom, or if the bathroom itself doubled as some sort of a day care facility.

Yet another shitty attempt at corrective lighting photography. I ruined this sweet pic at Vegas, just to much glare

This last one is for my brother Billy. One of his favorite terms when looking for one to burn, I found this written into a bathroom advertisement in Dallas, TX.

Well, that is about the best I was able to do on my RAZR phone… I am skilled in a lot of things OTHER than taking mobile phone pictures. Thank you for going down memory lane with me one last time RAZR. I miss you always.

Your friend,

–AFB