Just saw Incredibles 2. The designer of Elastigirl’s big ass deserves the Oscar for Making My Dong Rock Hard.

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) July 18, 2018

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A lot of people ask me the difference between a white nationalist and a white supremacist.

• A white nationalist is someone who believes in a strictly enforced authoritarian racial ethnostate.

• A white supremacist is a white nationalist, with sour cream and diced tomatoes.

— Julius Goat (Read Pinned Tweet!) (@JuliusGoat) July 17, 2018

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Apocalypse Now: behind the scenes of Slayer’s explosive final tour https://t.co/ZeIY4tZhl6 pic.twitter.com/uxz9XAnuJc

— GQ Style (@GQStyle) July 17, 2018

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Me: *removes $7,000 laptop from online shopping cart*

— Bryan Jones (@bdkjones) July 16, 2018

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Shout out to sad as hell pie charts. pic.twitter.com/pjouXyrQLr

— George Wallace (@MrGeorgeWallace) July 8, 2018

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every year when the nathan’s hot dog eating competition comes around I am inexorably forced to remember this quote from a former competitor pic.twitter.com/knOseKuyZY

— KT NELSON (@KrangTNelson) July 4, 2018

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Yup, the rumor is true. Flat Earthers have supporters all around the globe.

— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) July 2, 2018

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god made satan to give you pleasure and satisfaction yeah its true now you can satan my face

— shut up, dick (@hipstermaid) June 29, 2018

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I made a free commercial for the Red Hen in Lexington, VA! pic.twitter.com/7wAQVpg62O

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) June 23, 2018

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DAMN https://t.co/N8JXaETjR8

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) June 22, 2018

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