In what could be the greatest decision that has ever been handed down in the entire history of the United States legal system, Zamboni operator John Paragallo was exonerated of all charges after losing his license for blowing a .12 BAC at the rink. John told police he had the following for breakfast:
A shot of Sambuca with his morning coffee, and two valium pills..
He only starting drinking Beer and Vodka AFTER the ice had already been cleared.
The judge ruled that because the vehicle was not capable of driving on city streets, and could not hold passengers, it was NOT considered a “Motor Vehicle”. Unfortunately, only John Paragallo’s lawyer commented on the ESPN story, which is a shame as I would have liked to hear what this man had to say.. as well as if he is looking for a roommate.
—AFB
2 responses to “HJAY’S Sports update”
A great post, there are always plenty of drinking related posts here, but never enough sports posts. Way to bridge that gap.
I don’t know WTF is up with that text shit?
That guy is my hero!! There is obviously a job opening, were do I apply?